


The Bluejay In The Corner

by PigInBlackClothing



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Idiots in Love, Love Letters, M/M, Nervous Stutter, Secret Admirer, Work In Progress, secret reddie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:20:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22703104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PigInBlackClothing/pseuds/PigInBlackClothing
Summary: He couldn’t keep it in any longer, but he couldn’t just tell someone, it was too dangerous. When he got up to his room he pulled out a thick page of blue stationery and began to write.
Relationships: Bill Denbrough & Stanley Uris, Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20
Collections: IT ❀ Valentine's Day Fic Exchange





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [marsisaplanet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/marsisaplanet/gifts).



> This is not complete, I had the idea and it grew. I will update often.

Bill Denbrough had been in love with one of his best friends for as long as he could remember. Stan was his light in the dark, the beauty in a world that seemed so ugly, Stan was his everything; He just didn’t know that. 

Bill was brave when it came to most things, standing up for his friends, fighting an evil clown, but his feelings for Stan were always a thing he was afraid of. He had every right to be, from a young age he’d heard the stories of what happens to boys like him, boys who loved boys, gutted, stabbed, beaten, and most recently drowned.

He liked to believe that he could tell the other losers, they’d never said anything to make him think otherwise, but he didn’t want to risk losing them because of what he was. 

But his feelings for Stan grew every day, every time the sun started to go down and the vibrant tones in the sky would paint Stan’s hair even more golden, every time they played Chicken at the quarry and Stan would sit on his shoulders, every time Richie forced them to see a horror movie and Stan would grab his hand at the scariest parts.

It all built to the point where Bill felt like he was going to explode if he didn’t do something. The tipping point was after Prom, The losers left early and went to the clubhouse, Richie brought a CD player and Mike brought whiskey, it was a long night. Bill drank a little, but not enough, he was scared that if he let go he would say something he wouldn’t be able to take back.

Stan drank a lot. He was the one most against going to Derry’s Prom, he complained the whole time, but Bill was far too distracted by how gorgeous he looked to care. He’d stacked his curls all at the top of his head, letting some hang into his face. He wore a deep royal blue suit jacket and a perfectly ironed white shirt beneath it. He paired that with nicely fitted black slacks and black dress shoes with matching blue laces. He was the literal definition of a tall drink of water and Bill was practically drooling for most of the night. 

The thing that finally broke Bill, told him he needed to do something, happened when the rest of the losers had already left. Richie and Eddie left first, saying that Eddie needed to get home before his mother had a fit, Then Beverly left, she had a midnight curfew while she was living with her aunt, Ben left to walk her home. Mike left shortly after that so that he’d be able to get up on time to tend to the farm. 

That left Bill and Stan, with slow songs and booze. Bill had originally decided that they’d just sleep there since Stan was too drunk to make it home by himself, Then Stan went to Richie’s CD stash and put something in the player. Bill could hear the clicking of the skip button being pressed as Stan found the song he wanted. The Beatles’ “Blackbird” began to play and Bill smiled to himself. 

Blackbird singing in the dead of night  
Stan surprised Bill, turning and grabbing his hand, meeting Bill’s eyes before saying “Dance with me” in a soft tone. Bill’s stomach exploded with butterflies, his stutter had gotten better over the years, but still, it persisted when he was nervous. “Wuh-wuh-What?” he stammered out as Stan snaked his arms around Bill’s neck. “I said to dance with me” he smiled, looking at Bill with hooded eyes and beginning to sway.

Bill could feel his skin heat up, he hoped Stan wouldn’t notice the blush. “Oh, Uh-Okay,” he said, awkwardly wrapping his arms around Stan’s waist. This means nothing, he kept telling himself, Stan danced with Richie earlier, sure it wasn’t a slow dance but he’s just drunk, wants affection is all. 

Bill was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt Stan lean in closer. 

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Bill felt like he was on fire, hyper-focusing on every point of contact and trying to convince himself not to read into it. When the song was over Stan stepped away, smiling. Bill felt guilty for the effect that dance had on him when Stan would likely not even remember it, he had to get out of here. 

“Listen I-I’m going to go” He managed to get out, “Do y-you want me to wuh-walk you home or are you staying here?” He asked, trying to keep an even tone, “I’ll stay here.” Stan said lazily, taking off his jacket and getting in the hammock. He was so beautiful. “Okay, I-I’ll see you Monday.” Bill said, quickly climbing out of the clubhouse and inhaling the fresh air. 

He walked back to his house slowly, taking the time to think. He couldn’t keep it in any longer, but he couldn’t just tell someone, it was too dangerous. When he got up to his room he pulled out a thick page of blue stationery and began to write. 

I can’t get you out of my head  
I fall harder every time I look into your eyes  
I simply adore you  
-  
Once he was finished he looked over the note and made sure his writing wasn’t recognizable, It was too clean, he wanted it to be personal, He doodled a small bluejay in the corner of the parchment before folding it and sticking it in the front pocket of his backpack. He’d go to school early and slip the note into Stan’s locker, no one would know it was him and he’d be able to get his feelings out. 

He went to bed that night with a weight lifted off his shoulders and a smile on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan woke up Sunday morning alone in the clubhouse to the sound of the Beatles playing softly, a massive hangover, and a crick in his neck.

Stan woke up Sunday morning alone in the clubhouse to the sound of the Beatles playing softly, a massive hangover, and a crick in his neck. He sat up slowly, cracking his neck and wincing. He made his way out of the hammock and walked over to the CD player to stop the looping music. He took the CD out and remembered putting it in the night before. 

Shit. Did that actually happen? He faintly remembers dancing, leaning into Bill. God, Bill has to know right? Know that Stan’s exactly what they call him. But he didn’t stop it, and he was blushing, right? Or maybe Stan’s projecting and was just creeping on one of his best friends. 

He remembers Bill leaving right after, what if he never wants to speak to Stan again because of what he is. A faggot, a fairy, a fudgepacker, every fucking word they’ve called him was true, and now Bill probably knows it too. 

He sighed, rubbing his eyes with his fists before starting to climb out of the clubhouse. He would know tomorrow how Bill would act, worrying about it wasn’t going to help anything.

He worried about it all night. 

\----------------------

Bill debated taking the note out of his backpack and crumbling it up for the entirety of Sunday. He hadn’t done it. 

By the time Monday morning came, he had talked himself into fully committing to the plan. He got up early for school, skipping breakfast at home and heading off with more than enough time to spare. He got to school before any of the buses returned to assure the hallways would be empty. He walked down to Stan’s locker and paused, psyching himself up before finally slipping the paper between the slits of the locker. 

He backed away from the locker immediately afterward, quickly walking to his locker and acting casual as the hall gradually became crowded. The first losers to walk in were Richie and Eddie, as they moved closer he could hear that Richie was laughing about something, his arm strung over Eddie’s shoulder, Eddie wore a deep blush and a mild scowl. Bill guessed it had been a joke about Eddie’s mom that Richie was still snickering about as they walked over. 

“Good Morning Billium.” Richie said cheerfully as he removed his arm from around Eddie and started to open his locker, a couple of lockers down. “Hey, R-Richie” Bill stammered out in response, wincing at his stutter, he might as well be wearing a sign that said: HEY I’M NERVOUS ABOUT SOMETHING. “You alright?” Eddie asked with a look of concern that Bill had grown to despise. “Yuh-Yeah, Just an ah-off day, Eddie.” Bill answered, hoping it would be enough to let the subject drop. Eddie nodded before walking over to his own locker, next to Stan’s. 

Mike came in next, stopping by his locker before walking over to the group. “Hey,” he said warmly, Soon Beverly and Ben joined them, casual conversation being swapped between the group as Bill sat in almost silence. He snuck glances at the doorway until he finally saw Stan walk in. He looked almost as nervous as Bill felt, walking over to the group instead of going to his locker first like he always did. 

“Hey,” Stan said, almost like a question, as he looked at Bill. “Heh-Hey.” he sputtered out, Jesus, he couldn’t even get out a single word. Bill watched Stan study him for a moment like he was waiting for something, his stomach filled with dread. After a second or two Stan swapped greetings with the other losers before turning and walking to his locker. 

Bill bit the inside of his cheek as he waited for Stan to finish his combination, The door opened, the blue paper fell to the floor, Bill’s heart stopped. Stan bent down to pick up the note, unfolding it and reading it with a puzzled look on his face. He looked up, eyes searching the hallway, Bill quickly turned back to the group. 

After a moment or two, Bill heard Stan’s locker shut and him walking towards the group. “Richie, if this is your idea of a prank, you're bad at pranks.” He said almost flatly, causing the group to turn and look at him. “What are you talking about?” Richie asked looking at Stan with furrowed brows. Stan handed him the note, he read it and grinned. “This wasn’t me, Staniel, somehow you’ve actually got yourself a secret admirer.” He laughed. 

Those words caused the rest of the losers to perk up, taking turns reading the note, Bill tried his best to act surprised as he re-read his words. Ben and Beverly were probably the most excited, being the romantics they are, unfortunately, that meant they immediately started the search for who the girl writing Stan was. Stan seemed a little uncomfortable with the fuss but overall quite happy, a smile never leaving his face after Richie said the words ‘secret admirer’. 

There was nothing Bill loved more than seeing Stan happy. The way he always tried to tame his smile smaller, eventually stopping fighting it and letting it break free at full force. Stan’s smile was the most beautiful one in the world according to Bill, The way it crinkled his eyes and was always apparent in his voice. Bill never wanted to stop making Stan smile smiles he couldn’t fight.


End file.
